These grain free cookies are ridiculous. I’m so completely in awe of them that “ridiculous” is the only word I can think of to describe them at the moment. I mean that in a ridiculously delicious kind of way, of course.
I haven’t even named these “yumsville’s” yet, but maybe they should be called “4 Ingredient Ridonkey Good Grain Free Cookies”. Let’s just see if I have the girl balls to follow through with that idea by the time I publish this post!
The reason I’m so speechless over these cookies might be because I haven’t had a “real” cookie in almost 2 years.
And by “real”, I mean a “glutenified” cookie.
*I like to make up new words*
*And I like to put everything in quotes*
These grain free cookies surprised me. I felt like I was eating a REAL COOKIE, and for all intents and purposes, it is a real cookie to me.
Before I get into the crazy good texture of these grain free cookies, let me tell you the ingredients!
You. Will. Die.
1. Dates
2. Walnuts
3. Chocolate chips
4. Vanilla
Tell me you’re not dying right now?
You’ll have a legit heart attack when I tell you this next part…
Not only do these cookies have a taste that will cause you to make noises out loud, but the texture is RIDONKEY GOOD, too!
These grain free cookies are a little crunchy on the outside and chewy on the inside.
Isn’t that what every cookie aspires to be?
They’re soooo satisfying. I’m not even going to tell you that, for like, a month, I was making a batch of these yummy grain free cookies every other day (hehe).
Whaaaaat? Noooo.
But don’t worry, healthy fats won’t make you fat, they’ll only make you PHAT. I should know.
I think it’s safe to say that I’ve fully adapted to eating the types of foods that make me feel my best. I’d rather have these healthy, grain free cookies any day over the stuff that used to keep me sick.
Now back to the ingredients, and I’m going to have to get serrrious for a second.
To anyone reading this that gets all “creeped out” by “weird” recipes:
Let me start by saying…
Hi. THESE AREN’T WEIRD INGREDIENTS. 
Did you see the list that we talked about above? These are things that “normal” people eat.
I didn’t put seaweed in these cookies, yo.
(Can I make cookies out of seaweed? Humm..)
I was chatting with a member in my closed group on Facebook the other day, and she was telling me about how she made this awesome, grain free dessert for her daughter’s birthday party. Everyone was happily eating it and thought it was really good… UNTIL they found out it was grain free. Then, they all changed their minds.
Why is it that a dessert made without refined flour and sugar is automatically “weird”?
Now, I don’t know what ingredients that birthday dessert was made with, but I’ve given my grain free goodies to “normal” eaters and they always look like they’re “eating with caution”; like something bad is about to happen to them.
When I passed around my {100% Flourless} Double Chocolate Grain Free Brownies for people to try, it was like watching a room full of terrified people, with wide and afraid eyes, who looked like they were about to be murdered.
That’s actually how I look when I eat gluten, so I totally get it.
Rachael Abel eating gluten for the first time in 1.5 years (the after effects weren’t pretty).
But when I eat gluten, I look that way because something bad is actually about to happen to me.
Assuming you have no allergies or pure hatred for the ingredients in these cookies – tell me…
Why they gotta be so “weird”?
But let me get off my healthy-high-horse and be honest…
I know that the unhealthy Rachael from 4+ years ago would have turned her nose up at the foods the healthy Rach eats now. For the love of BJ, that old Rach didn’t even really like vegetables.
*This is my first time ever talking in the third person… which makes it seem like I’m on some other kind of “horse ride”*
If I could go back in time and say something to the old me, I’d be like, “Mrs. McAbel, seriously… what the frack is wrong with you? Why in the Sam heck can’t you try more things and be more adaptable to change? There’s nothing weird about plant based foods at all, you crazy craybot! It’s like you’re actually trying to kill yourself. What the frack?! But you’re still totes adorbs, so keep that up!”
And those would probably be my exact words.
Ok, I think I’ve said everything that needs to be said here.
I’d like to hear from you now — about the cookies or anything else you feel like talking about.
Go love yourself,
P.S. I was obviously feelin’ mah girl ballz.
- Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Place dates and filtered water in a food processor, fitted with a metal blade, and process until the dates turn into a paste-like consistency, but not completely smooth. Add ½ of the walnuts, vanilla and salt and process until the mixture begins to form a ball - stopping once to scrape down the sides of the bowl.
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- With a spoon, evenly disperse the walnut/date mixture throughout the food processor; then add in the remaining 1 cup of walnuts and chocolate chips. Pulse until well blended - stirring as necessary - and keeping the walnuts a chunky consistency. Note: If you smooth out the cookie batter too much, the cookie texture won't be as "crunchy" on the outside.
- Using a medium-sized cookie scoop (or form into balls using 1.5 to 2 tablespoons for each cookie), place the cookies about 1-inch apart on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper or a non-stick silicone baking mat. To easily flatten into a cookie shape, cover the cookie dough with a piece of parchment paper and press down on the cookies with the bottom of another baking tray or any object that has a flat surface.
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Bake for 12 minutes, then carefully flip each cookie and bake for another 5 minutes on the other side, or until the edges of the cookie are a deep golden brown. Place on cooling racks; cookies will get more crunchy as they cool.
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